Dozens of tiny flames flickered over blue, pink and white patterned candles — the colors of the transgender pride flag — as a group of El Pasoans held a moment of silence for Nex Benedict.
The event was one of the dozens of vigils held all over the country Sunday to honor the life of the 16-year-old sophomore who died a day after a physical altercation in the girls’ bathroom at their high school in Owasso, Okla. Nex, who identified as nonbinary and used they/them pronouns, was born in El Paso.
Bodycam footage released on Feb. 23 revealed Nex told police they had gotten into a fight with three girls who were picking on them and their friends. The girls attacked Nex for squirting water on them, the teen said in the video.
In a Feb. 21 update on the investigation, the Owasso Police Department claimed that Nex did not die from the fight according to preliminary information from the medical examiner’s office. An official cause of death is still pending until toxicology results are in, according to the update.
El Pasoans gather at Memorial Park on Sunday, Feb. 25, to remember 16-year-old Nex Benedict, a non-binary person and native El Pasoan who died in Oklahoma after a fight in a school bathroom. (Corrie Boudreaux/El Paso Matters) Credit: J.Discher
The El Paso vigil a week ago was organized by members of the community and several local LGBTQ advocacy organizations, including El Paso Sun City Pride, PFLAG El Paso, Mountainstar Pride, the Borderland Rainbow Center and the El Paso Gender and Sexualities Alliance — or EPGSA.
Though Nex was no longer a resident of El Paso, the incident hit close to home for many local members of the LGBTQ community at the event, who have faced bullying and discrimination.
“Some of us experienced bullying, some of us experienced being closeted at that age because we were terrified of society and each of us resonates in some way with their situation. Unfortunately enough, a lot of us know someone who was their age or younger when they passed and that’s why we all come here because we all know that pain,” administrative assistant for the Borderland Rainbow Center, Andi Tiscareno, told El Paso Matters at the vigil.
Benedict’s family says Nex regularly faced bullying at school.
Andi Tiscareño says that “Nex should be alive today” as El Pasoans hold a candlelight vigil in Memorial Park for 16-year-old Nex Benedict, a non-binary student who was born in El Paso and died after an altercation in a school bathroom in Oklahoma, Sunday, Feb. 25. (Corrie Boudreaux/El Paso Matters)
During the event at Memorial Park, community members and leaders got a chance to speak. Some made calls to action urging religious and community leaders who support the LGBTQ community to speak up and stand for them. Others denounced the anti-LGBTQ laws that have been proposed and passed in both Oklahoma and Texas.
“Last year and during the legislative session we saw over 55 anti-LGBT bills. Before that, we saw sports bans and bathroom bills. Bathroom bills like the one in Oklahoma that forced Nex and their transgender friend to use the girls’ bathroom where they were both attacked and beaten,” Transgender Education Network of Texas Associate Diaz Camacho said during the vigil referring to an Oklahoma law that requires public school students to use the bathroom of the sex listed on their birth certificate.
Camacho identifies as nonbinary and uses they/them pronouns.
Diaz Camacho speaks at a candlelight vigil in Memorial Park held for 16-year-old Nex Benedict, a non-binary student who was born in El Paso and died after an altercation in a school bathroom in Oklahoma, Sunday, Feb. 25. Camacho said that trans and non-binary people often believe they will die young due to high rates of bullying and abuse. (Corrie Boudreaux/El Paso Matters)
Advocates at the vigil said they have recently seen several transgender children and their parents go into hiding or leave Texas in response to recently enacted Senate Bill 14.
The bill, which was signed by Gov. Greg Abbott in September 2023, bans transgender children from getting puberty blockers and hormone therapies.
Tiscareno said many of the transgender youth who used to attend the Rainbow Center’s meetings have stopped going after the bill’s passage.
“A lot of them disappear because their parents are terrified of either what’s going to happen to their kids or what’s going to happen to them because they’re supporting their kids,” Tiscareno said.
Even though Texas doesn’t have any laws that dictate what bathrooms a person can use, the fear of harassment still makes it difficult for some transgender people to go about their day-to-day lives.
“She is afraid to go out of the house,” PFLAG board member Pat Torres told El Paso Matters referring to her adult transgender daughter. “If she needs to go to the restroom she would ask me to go home because she’s afraid somebody will tell her something for using the women’s restroom.”
For some, Nex’s death reinforced their concerns about the need to protect transgender children from bullying and harassment while they are in school.
“It’s just so heartbreaking because when you send kids to school they’re supposed to be safe there,” El Paso City Council member and former El Paso Independent School District board member Josh Acevedo told El Paso Matters. “This is why it’s important for us to have bathrooms that are going to be safe for everyone to go into. I feel that that could have made a huge difference with Nex.”
Acevedo said that while he was at EPISD, the district worked with transgender students and tried to accommodate them to ensure they can use the restroom they are most comfortable in.
EPGSA Founder Aurelio “Lio” Valdez said El Paso students have faced hate speech in the past.
“My biggest concern is hate speech turning into violence,” Valdez told El Paso Matter before the vigil.
The post El Pasoans hold vigil to honor nonbinary teen Nex Benedict; advocate for transgender youth appeared first on El Paso Matters.
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